Based off a tip from my friend Brian, I took a trip over to Liuzhangli MRT Station to see a billboard for Taiwan’s Military. The billboard is located on the wall of the Taiwan Recruitment Center. He told me I had to see it for myself and call him as soon as I saw it. The trip was worth it. To best describe the billboard, I have to use the US military slogan “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”. Those familiar with this slogan will get the joke right away. For the rest of you, I’ll fill you in after the picture.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

The term “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” refers to a US military policy that prohibits: “anyone who “demonstrate(s) a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts” from serving in the armed forces of the United States, because it “would create an unacceptable risk to the high standards of morale, good order and discipline, and unit cohesion that are the essence of military capability.” So basically if you’re gay, don’t tell them about it.

The picture above is wrong on so many levels. In the US, peoples idea of military men are that they are hard core and tough. Obviously from this picture, Taiwan is a little different. Normally military is used to strike fear into your opponents, but I doubt China would be scared after seeing this photo.

The billboard just emanates….how can I put it lightly…..gay. The main picture has 10 half naked men laying on top of each other forming a pyramid, one is making a cutesy face with his fingers pointed into his cheeks, while 3 others look like they are 4 year old girls taking a birthday photo. A Taiwanese person would say “Oh, no, no, they are just showing how happy they are, and how fun it is to be in the military!” I just want to know why they are smiling so much…

The lower left picture doesn’t help much either. The half naked guys are tied up, perhaps appealing to the fetish crowd?

Bondage?

The thing with Taiwan is that not only do the guys act feminine, but now the military does too. Where does the madness end?

After checking out this picture I walked around the building to the front entrance and saw an awesome statue in the window. Now I’m sure they didn’t do this intentionally, but take a look at the statue on the right and what is the first thing you think of? My answer after the picture, let’s see if we match.

He Looks Like The…

“Stay Puft Marshmallow Man” from the movie “Ghostbusters”.

Do you have anything to add? Let the world know in the comments.

Finding shoes for me in Taiwan is not the easiest thing to do. I wear a US size 13. If the planets all align and the wind is blowing south/southeast I might be able to find a size 12, but usually when I do they look like this:

Thank you Adidas for making probably THE ugliest shoe I have ever seen in my life, no seriously, I dare anyone to show me a picture of an uglier shoe. In fact let’s make it a contest. Whomever can show me an uglier shoe, wins a free beer. You can pick the beer and the place(in Taiwan) and it’s yours!

Besides the ugly shoes, the type of shoe I have been wanting lately are leather casual shoes. All my life it’s been running shoes, or skater shoes, or shoes of that type. The thing I learned about those types of shoes is they suck when they get wet. They absorb 100% of the water and make my already stinky shoes smell worse. I need to throw then in the washer every time I drive in the rain. Then it’s another day or so for drying before I can wear them again. Well no more! Since I can’t actually go to a shoe store to buy shoes (fuck you midget feet Taiwanese!) I have to shop online on Yahoo Auctions Taiwan. Then I get the pleasure of searching for people selling size 13 and pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster God that they have something decent looking.

The reason I want to get some leather shoes, is for one, they look nice, they are more water resistant then cotton lined shoes, and I need to fake like I have some class. I have some prospects now, and If I manage to purchase them, I’ll make a nice post about it. Good luck on that contest.

Typhoon is over. Was kinda pussy-ish. Windows rattled a little last night. By the time I woke up, it was pretty much all over with. Some rain continued throughout the day, but that was that. I have some pics of the damage for you to enjoy.

Tree Branches and Twigs Everywhere

The Wall Fell Down

Where Did The Sign Go?

Found It!

Ahh what a week, what a week! I am so sick, last friday I went out drinking and now I have an iCold. Been taking medicine, but I’m not sure if my iCold is getting any iBetter, guess I have iYellow fever. Besides that this week I have started my new job at the iKindergarten, which means waking up at 6:45am to get there by 8am. It isn’t a tough job, it’s actually quite fun and relaxing. This week has been incredibly easy, as only Monday have I got to actually teach. Tue-Thur has been a breeze. Tuesday, the whole iKindergarten class had a fun “game day” which took 3 hours, and the teachers played along. Wednesday it was picture day part 1, and that took up most of the day. Thursday was picture day part 2 which once again took most of the day. Good thing every week isn’t like this, or my kids would learn nothing. I’ll get some pictures up of them soon. My co-teacher took some pics on her digital camera, and hopefully she will send them to me soon.

So i’m sure your wondering about the title. Well it’s kinda about the main topic today. 2 days ago I bought myself a iPod mini, the 6 gig one. It’s such a sweet little toy, I have uploaded over 800 files onto it and it’s still not even 50% full yet. I added all the cd’s I brought here, the ones I downloaded, my chinese language tapes(which total over 24 hours of play time) and a couple of audiobooks. Apple has made a great product for sure, but whats with naming everything i-something? From iPod to iTunes to iMac! I have tried to do that in my post, but I think it’s starting to come off as iStupid. Anyways i’m happy with my little toy, was well worth the money, as it’s gonna help me my boredom problems, and I can learn and junk too! Here is a pic of my iPod, its hard to tell, but it’s pretty tiny.

I’m sure with my job and monthly income(did I forget to mention in Asia everyone gets paid monthly?) I’ll have more stories and adventures for you…so expect updates more often.