I like my scooter. Everything was going good, until that day. Let me tell you about it with a poem.

‘Twas the night before Tuesday, when all through my house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. I was all warm and snug in my bed, with thoughts of Asian porn still dancing in my head. When outside there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. Away to the front window I flew like a flash, opened the window to see what crashed. When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a black Mercedes Benz, with a driver filled with beer. With a drunk driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be some Taiwanese prick. More rapid than mosquitos my curses they came, and I screamed, and shouted, and called him bad names; “You fuckhead! You dipshit! You jerkoff, and cocksucker! You jackass! You asshole! You dumbshit and motherfucker! To the top of my lungs! My voice bounced off the wall! Now stay right there! Stay right there! For the police I shall call!”

I sprang towards the door, but his engine gave a whistle, and away he flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim, as he was quite the yeller, “I learned how to drive from my teacher, Helen Keller!” -The End

16 scooters were trashed that night, mine included. The Benz was a rental, but luckily some people were close by and got the plate numbers. He did a lot of damage to not only scooters, but to the road and street signs. He was caught and his insurance has agreed to cover all costs for repairs. What did they do to him you might ask? Slap on the wrists. Now the pictures.

The aftermath.

More destruction.

This is the first bike he hit, it actually flew about 30 feet from where he hit it.

They all fall down.

First shot of the damage done to my scooter.

The pole is dead.

Front damage.

Side damage.

Back side damage.

The bike has already been fixed, 2 weeks of taxi’s sure were expensive. Now the bike is all nice and shiny, but I have no pictures to show you. My question is, who drinks and gets drunk on a Tuesday?

This entry was posted on Friday, July 14th, 2006 at 9:00 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.