On my 60th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a shaman living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.

After being persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my ticket to the shaman, and wondered what I was in for. The old man slowly, methodically produced a potion, handed it to me, and with a grip on my shoulder, warned, This is powerful medicine and it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then say ‘1-2-3.’ When you do that, you will be more potent than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want.’

I was encouraged. As he walked away, I turned and asked, ‘How do I stop the medicine from working?’

Your partner must say ‘1-2-3-4,’ the shaman responded. But when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon.

I was eager to see if it worked I went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my wife to join me in the bedroom. When she came in, I took off my clothes and said, ‘1-2-3!’

Immediately, I was the manliest of men.

My wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes. And then she asked, What was the 1-2-3 for?

And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition.

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